Friday, December 14, 2012

How we USED to feel and think

2 interesting poems....
(My comments at the end)

#1 A Simple Smile, A Scream Inside

There's so much no one knows,
So much that no one sees,
About the way I feel inside,
my thoughts and all my needs.

Maybe it's that they don't look,
Or the fact that I don't show,
Either way, there are things inside
that no one seems to know.

I want to show the world,
I want everyone to see,
all the thoughts and ideas
that flow inside of me.

Maybe you haven't noticed,
or maybe you don't dare,
to find out who I am,
to show me that you care.

I'm screaming on the inside,
a smile is what you see,
But I'm not content with the person
I seem to be.

There's a different person on the inside,
that I can't seem to show,
but maybe if you took the time,
that person you could know..

"Taken from Chicken Soup For The Teen Soul"

#2 Stone By Stone

I have a wall you cannot see
because it's deep inside of me
it blocks my heart on every side
and helps emotions there to hide
you cant reach in
i cant reach out
you wonder what it's all about

the wall i built that you cant see
results from insecurity
each time my tender heart was hurt
the scars within grew worse and worse
so stone by stone
i built a wall
thats now so thick it will not fall

please understand that its not you
continue trying to break through
i want so much to show myself
and love from you will really help
so bit by bit
chip at my wall
til stone by stone it starts to fall

i know the process will be slow
its never easy to let go
of hurts and failures long ingrained
upon one's heart from years of pain
im so afraid
to let you in
i know i might get hurt again

i try to hard to break the wall
but seem to get nowhere at all
for stone upon each stone ive stacked
and left between them not a crack
the only way
to make it fall is imperfections in the wall

i did the best i could to build
a perfect wall, but there are still
a few small flaws, which "is" the key
to breaking through the wall to me
please use each flaw
to cause a crack
to knock a stone off of the stack

for just as stone by stone was laid
with every hurt and every pain
so stone by stone the wall will break
as love replaces every ache
please be the one
who cares enough
to find the flaws, no matter what

Stone by Stone, "Chicken Soup for the Teen Soul" by Rachel Bentley


ps: These are the poems that as a teenager, i used to like.
(Found them after few years ! Via Syaykh Googly Google)
Such a typical teen girl.
But seriously, that's how most of the teens today feel. Hmmmm...  :/
(If you get what i mean- from what you understood from the poem)

Again, i used to (Read: USED TO) read and like these poems.
I used to- so they unnecessarily resemble my personality/identity/character for today.
(I'm a BIG girl now, a young adult alhamdulillah) :D

Anyhow, reflecting upon these 2, can u imagine how much these young people wanted us (who are so-called so concern and care of them) to listen to them, 'reach' to their feelings and thoughts, to understand and to be genuinely sympathy and empathy towards them..

To my second thought, do we realize, how frustrating and disappointing it is to see so many of them came from a broken family institution, having their potential talents to be polished-retarded then destroyed.

And then you can see in some of them having psychological disorders accumulated in them, such feelings/thought or (should i say) inferior complexity developed within them and then expressed, waiting to be heard, understood and taken 'heed' from those who may concern or from who they seek unreplied attention from, which their family members had failed to do so in the first place ! It's so painful to see this. SubhanAllah.. Seriously it is. Allahul musta'an.. :(

I feel for them.

Now, i believe we have to do something about this.
It's time for action. Let's start from small ones, at smaller scale.
Not to forget making or bringing changes for the larger scale- to help all kids from the entire world- Doesn't seem feasible enough for me, not yet. Allahu a'alam)
Let's start with the people near us.
Let's start listening to those around us.
Let's us see what can we do to help them.
Let's try our best.
Let's begin with those who are the closest to us.
Let's do something.
I know it's worth something. InshaAllah.

It's better than not trying at all.
From there, we can move to greater plans targeting to a bigger scale.
If you get what i mean here. InshaAllah :)

Ya Rabb, please bless us all in our age, wealth, health, family and most importantly,
Pls bless us with strong iman and taqwa..

*Concern of the youth today*
Blissful with love and peace,
Umm Teem

Monday, June 25, 2012

Help! My child isn't talking to me!


A must read article!
Applicable to not just those with children, but to the siblings, inshaAllah..
*And to future mothers* ;)

ParenThots - Features - Help! My child isn't talking to me!

And another interesting and handy article:

May them benefit us all. Amin :)


Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Him? Not now, please

A post i've been keeping for soooo long!
It's for you my love..


Ukhty habibty,

I know you think a lot of him.
I know you worry a lot of his well being.
I know you care about him.
I know you miss him.

Fair enough to say,
ok, you 'like' him.
and not too extreme to say, 'love' him?

But dear sister,

He doesn't deserve your attention.
He doesn't deserve your care and concern.
He doesn't deserve your thoughts.
He is not worthy of all these- yet.

He is NOT your husband.

Your parents, close sisters and friends,
They deserve your attention, concern, love and time..

Most importantly, you have ALLAH and HIS Rasul (s)! More to learn, know about. What else to give Them their due right- that is to LOVE Them more than anything?..

Allah and Rasulullah (s) and all these people around you have their rights that you need to fullfil,

NOT HIM-yet.
Not him, not until he's halal for you!!

After all, who promises you he's the one that Allah had decreed for, to be your future husband?

What if his name wasn't written in lauh mahfuz all this while??
And that you'd been spending time crying over nights- for him?

Let not what is not in your hands distracts you from focusing what's in your hands now..

Face it, he is not worthy of your attention, energy and time- yet.

I hate how he takes you away from us all, now.

Not now, please..

We keep making dua if he's the one for you, Allah will bless you both with marriage, one day. InshaAllah.

If it's not him, i believe Allah will definitely give you someone better- THE BEST!
That's what you asked from HIM right?
And never didn't HE answer your dua, did HE?
Maybe a lil bit delay in time, but worth waiting, eyh? :)

So no worries...

Stay focus, my love.
Bare with us.

InnAllaha ma'assobirin.. :)

*Stay strong*

A post to keep you and me-strong, with so much love and peace,
Umm Teem

Monday, May 14, 2012

Breaking The Stereotype: The 'P'

"Do you think woman will still love her husband after 5 years?"

I was like "what??"

The issue was pretty 'hot' last night.

We had a talk on "Muslimah: Breaking the Stereotype"

Well, i think it somehow created stereotypes to the audiences on some issue-like yhe 'P'? :)

Ok. The issue was actually on the 'P'- polygamy.
The speaker said that a man started thinking about marrying another when his wife started to stop loving him, which according to him after 5 years. (If i understood correctly)

Man, i wanted so much to grab the mike last night and said this:

"I'm so sorry ustaz. Are you trying to say that man would want to marry second because the wife is no longer loving him? Is that a valid reson to let a man marrying another? I'm sorry to say this, but i actually don't agree with that, with all of my due respect, ustaz. I recognize polygamy and i support it as it is recognized in islam too, but i believe it to be taken seriously with conditions for its great wisdoms. Men must be able to be justice, financially capable, marrying another for the sake of Allah like helping a single mother or a sister to provide her security and shelter or to fullfil both parties' needs as agreed.. and PLEASE let your wife know and discuss with her, tho' the marriage is till valid without her consent. Please be 'a man', be creative to talk to her.

Ok. I recognize all these. But to marry another one just because you feel or think that your wife is no longer loving you after 5 years? That's unacceptable! How bout regaining her love, communicate with her. that's what making up a relation, not abondaning her and marrying to a second wife. What if your second wife stop loving you too? Are you gonna marry to a third? Then fourth?.."

Allahul musta'an..

i respect the speaker, and i still do. Bi ithnillah.
But someone has to break this..
And i kinda regret that i didn't.

Lessons learnt: speak out your mind. Clarify. Be open to criticism.

This is just my 2 cents.

My opinions? You  may choose to disagree.

But if it's a commandment from Allah?
"sa mi'na wa ata'na", We hear and we obey..

The wisdoms of all these commandments?
It's up to you now to discover them.

Be proactive!

Allah please bless us in last night's gathering. Amin.

With so much love and peace,
Umm Teem.

Monday, January 30, 2012

'SisterHood', As Defined in Our Own Way :)

Bismillah. Assalamu'alaykum!

Mode: Happy

[Me] Assalamu'alaykum my kakak! My oh my. i wish there's a bro like u so that i can marry him :D
Miss u n ur sister. Hope to c u girls soon inshaAllah :)

‎[Sis P] :O

[Me] What does ':O' suppose to mean?? :D

[Sis P] hehe, i first read n went like 'waaaaaaat!' in my head, so i comented such. haha

[Sis Q] Wa alaikum assalam wrt wbt my super cool adik!

Lol! what a lovely msg! hehehe! I wish the prince who forgot his way or lost his horse saw this msg! :P 

Miss you more my dear! see you soooon habibti ♥ ♥ ♥

As i posted to my dear friend's FB wall (Sis Q). We used to tease each other, what a great couple we could be with a spouse of each other's personality- uhuh. we are that close as sisters that we could joke around this way. Alhamdulillah. So don't get us wrong! We are normal human beings with normal fitrah Allah has created. We don't fall in love with girls.. :)

And she replied (So did her lovely younger sister- Sis P). Haha.

*Guess i really miss all of my friends, or dearer to call them my 'sisters', who i love for Allah's sake..*

"There are some people who your heart knows so well that you count their company as one of your greatest blessings of this life.."
As posted by another sister.. My, oh my.. You read my mind ;) 


I always have fun with you all whenever we get together. 

How our gatherings always bring serene, happiness and tranquil to my heart. Deeply immerse in  warm, soothing sense of love- deep in the heart, the ONLY place which holds one's eman.. 
*Did i describe it correctly?*

How we spent our good time sharing stories, lessons learned throughout the day...
And the best part of it, how we came to relate all these with Islam. Awesome! MashaAllah..

How we remind each other of taqwa and patience in times of hardship and remind each other to say 'thank you Allah!' in times of ease.

How you girls rush to be the first to conceal each others' faults and giving your  hands to correct me while being the best advisor/counsellor to one another when i'm truly in need. Surprised to know you girls really get to know each others' updates so quick! Good WCCC, i'd to say. Wireless-care-and-concern connection ;)


I really thank Allah for all these great blessings:
  • righteous (and fun!) companions (and Allah knows best). 
  • sweetness of faith and the 'eman-rush'.
  • All the good times we had in remembering, talking about and calling for Allah (and will always continue experiencing them, inshaAllah). Recalling on those moments we were in troubles (and we could still laugh? LOL) Cool. Guess this 'emergency moments' is one of our best teachers (!) to teach us beautiful patience, total reliance and hope on Allah. Another best part of it, we faced all these amazing facets of life together, biithnillah.
  • The chance to improve ourselves to be better muslima.. 
This is what i called "Sisterhood", just the way we define it. ;)

Life is awesome with this awesome deen of its awesome people, who choose to believe its awesome gift of life offered. 

Thank you Allah.

A post to appreciate
Umm Teem

A Joyful Reminder (COPIED)

As salaamu alaikum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh to all my dear sisters!

These are things I ponder on as I go about my day.

There are NO BATHROOMS TO CLEAN in Jennah
There are NO DISHES TO WASH in Jennah
There is no LAUNDRY or IRONING to do in Jennah
There are NO "What on earth shall I make for dinner?" moments in Jennah
There are NO BAD HAIR DAYS in Jennah
There is NO NEED FOR MAKEUP in Jennah
We will NEVER HAVE TO PEE, POOP, or PUKE in Jennah
(Me: Yippee!)

Those thoughts make me go about my daily chores GLADLY, and even make me drag myself up to go the extra mile to do special things for my family. It seems such a small and simple price to pay for such an UNBELIEVABLE reward.

I love you, sisters. Keep on trucking, bi ithn Allah! 

Source click here: A Joyful Reminder!

So hope to see you all again in Jannah! inshaAllah! (;

Till we meet again, 
Umm Teem.

Monday, January 23, 2012



Here's few videos on ikhtilat issues discussed based on the life of the first generation of Islam- the best generation ever lived on the surface of our planet! Called e.a.r.t.h  :)



The Shyness (haya') of Muslim Women from The Early Generation

The Story of a Muazzin Who looked at a Girl

A Woman Giving Da'wah to Men and Lessons learnt from 'Aicha (r.anha))

O Believer- Lower Your Gaze

How a Pious Woman Should Commmunicate with (Stranger) Men

And more! Check on the Muslimz87 Channel.. You will find the whole series there. InshaAllah :)

*Vids shared as reminders, put for myself before others*


With so much love,
Your sister, Your twin of faith

Saturday, January 14, 2012

This is Love


How often we try to define what is LOVE and yet no justification can ever made to re-ensure what LOVE really means to us..

Look into your heart now my love, who IS there in your heart?


"..there are at least 2 types of love. There will be some people you love because of what you get from them: what they give you, the way they make you feel. This is perhaps the majority of love—which is also what makes much of love so unstable. A person’s capacity to give is inconstant and changing. Your response to what you are given is also inconstant and changing. So if you’re chasing a feeling, you’ll always be chasing.  No feeling is ever constant. If love is dependent on this, it too becomes inconstant and changing. And just like everything in this world, the more you chase it, the more it will run away from you.

But, once in a while, people enter your life that you love—not for what they give you—but for what they are. The beauty you see in them is a reflection of the Creator, so you love them. Now suddenly it isn’t about what you’re getting, but rather what you can give. This is unselfish love. This second type of love is the most rare. And if it is based in, and not competing with, the love of God, it will also bring about the most joy. To love in any other way is to need, to be dependent, to have expectations—all the ingredients for misery and disappointment."

Once you begin to see everything beautiful as only a reflection of God’s beauty, you will learn to love in the right way: for His sake. Everything and everyone you love with be for, through and because of Him. The foundation of such love is God. So what you hold onto will no longer be just an unstable feeling, a fleeting emotion. And what you chase will no longer be just a temporary high. What you hold, what you chase, what you love, will be God: the *only* thing stable and constant"

A post specially made for the-confused me.
May Allah make HIM the most beloved to us. Aamin..

And Allah knows best.

*Let your love be WITH HIM, BECAUSE OF HIM and FOR HIM*

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

My Dear Sisters: Please Don't Soften Your Voice

Bismillah. Assalamu'alaykum..
A reminder for us all today!

..فَلاَ تَخْضَعْنَ بِالْقَوْلِ فَيَطْمَعَ الَّذِى فِى قَلْبِهِ مَرَضٌ وَقُلْنَ قَوْلاً مَّعْرُوفاً..

“..then be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery) should be moved with desire, but speak in an honourable manner”
[al-Ahzaab 33:32] 

My beloved sisters, let's not soften our speech when talking to men. Let's see what scholars say about this (tafseer of the above ayah/verse) :

al-Qurtubi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in his Tafseer:
Allaah commanded them to make their speech serious and straightforward, and their posture and gestures should not convey and wrong ideas, as the Arab women used to do when speaking to men, by making the voice soft and gentle, like the speech of immoral women and prostitutes; He forbade them to do that.

It says in Mughni al-Muhtaaj (4/210), a book of Shaafa’i fiqh:
The woman’s voice is not ‘awrah, and it is permissible to listen to it if there is no fear of fitnah, but it is recommended for her to make her voice unappealing if there is a knock at the door, so she should not answer in a gentle voice, rather she should make it harsh by putting her hand over her mouth.

It says in Kashshaaf al-Qinaa’ (5/15), a book of Hanbali fiqh:
The voice (of a non-mahram woman) is not ‘awrah. It says in al-Furoo’ and elsewhere: according to the more correct opinion, it is haraam to gain pleasure from listening to it, even if she is reciting Qur’aan, for fear of fitnah. 
It says in Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (17/202):
The woman’s voice is not haraam in and of itself, and it is not haraam to listen to it unless there is some softness and gentleness in speech. It is haraam for a woman to speak in such a manner to anyone other than her husband, and it is haraam for men other than her husband to listen to it

I won't advice you to shout/raise your voice (to its highest pitch) to men when talking/dealing with them nor am i telling you to CUT OFF your communication completely with them when THERE IS A GREAT NEED for you to deal with them (When i say NEED, it really means NEED a.k.a you don't find ANY OTHER SISTERS to help you) But please don't soften your (readily womanly-soft) voice. Sisters, you know what i'm talking about- when a woman starts giggling here and there with her widest smile on face that her face is full with 'nur' + her cute lil' voice talking innocently to men. God, cair hati lelaki.. (Wa'iyadzhubillah!)

*side-note: Men please lower your gaze (It's in surah an-Nur: 30) and then women too (An-Nur: 31) To my niqabi sisters, it's more important for you to observe your speech since nothing appears from you-except your voice! But that's the best part of being niqabi and fully covered- the hidden face and expression. :)

So minimize your conversation to men (non-mahram,stranger-men) and speak what's important only! (Give them no chance to be 'hanky-panky' with you. Once things done between you and the guy, walk away!)

As Syaykh Salih Munajjid once advised:
It is permissible for a woman to speak in the presence of non-mahram men in cases of necessity, subject to the condition that the speech is straightforward and serious and there is no softness, temptation or provocation in her voice. Her voice is not ‘awrah according to the correct scholarly view. Women used to speak to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and ask him questions, and they used to speak to the Sahaabah about their needs, and they were not denounced for doing so. 

Again. Be professional in dealing with men, talk only what's necessary, have Allah in heart. Be mindful of Allah..

Have taqwa my lovely sisters. Allah's watching you!

And Allah knows best. Wallahua'alam.
(A humble note with A GREAT REMINDER for the forgetful me, before reminding others)

With SO MUCH LOVE to my sweet sisters, wassalam.