Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Him? Not now, please

A post i've been keeping for soooo long!
It's for you my love..


Ukhty habibty,

I know you think a lot of him.
I know you worry a lot of his well being.
I know you care about him.
I know you miss him.

Fair enough to say,
ok, you 'like' him.
and not too extreme to say, 'love' him?

But dear sister,

He doesn't deserve your attention.
He doesn't deserve your care and concern.
He doesn't deserve your thoughts.
He is not worthy of all these- yet.

He is NOT your husband.

Your parents, close sisters and friends,
They deserve your attention, concern, love and time..

Most importantly, you have ALLAH and HIS Rasul (s)! More to learn, know about. What else to give Them their due right- that is to LOVE Them more than anything?..

Allah and Rasulullah (s) and all these people around you have their rights that you need to fullfil,

NOT HIM-yet.
Not him, not until he's halal for you!!

After all, who promises you he's the one that Allah had decreed for, to be your future husband?

What if his name wasn't written in lauh mahfuz all this while??
And that you'd been spending time crying over nights- for him?

Let not what is not in your hands distracts you from focusing what's in your hands now..

Face it, he is not worthy of your attention, energy and time- yet.

I hate how he takes you away from us all, now.

Not now, please..

We keep making dua if he's the one for you, Allah will bless you both with marriage, one day. InshaAllah.

If it's not him, i believe Allah will definitely give you someone better- THE BEST!
That's what you asked from HIM right?
And never didn't HE answer your dua, did HE?
Maybe a lil bit delay in time, but worth waiting, eyh? :)

So no worries...

Stay focus, my love.
Bare with us.

InnAllaha ma'assobirin.. :)

*Stay strong*

A post to keep you and me-strong, with so much love and peace,
Umm Teem

Monday, May 14, 2012

Breaking The Stereotype: The 'P'

"Do you think woman will still love her husband after 5 years?"

I was like "what??"

The issue was pretty 'hot' last night.

We had a talk on "Muslimah: Breaking the Stereotype"

Well, i think it somehow created stereotypes to the audiences on some issue-like yhe 'P'? :)

Ok. The issue was actually on the 'P'- polygamy.
The speaker said that a man started thinking about marrying another when his wife started to stop loving him, which according to him after 5 years. (If i understood correctly)

Man, i wanted so much to grab the mike last night and said this:

"I'm so sorry ustaz. Are you trying to say that man would want to marry second because the wife is no longer loving him? Is that a valid reson to let a man marrying another? I'm sorry to say this, but i actually don't agree with that, with all of my due respect, ustaz. I recognize polygamy and i support it as it is recognized in islam too, but i believe it to be taken seriously with conditions for its great wisdoms. Men must be able to be justice, financially capable, marrying another for the sake of Allah like helping a single mother or a sister to provide her security and shelter or to fullfil both parties' needs as agreed.. and PLEASE let your wife know and discuss with her, tho' the marriage is till valid without her consent. Please be 'a man', be creative to talk to her.

Ok. I recognize all these. But to marry another one just because you feel or think that your wife is no longer loving you after 5 years? That's unacceptable! How bout regaining her love, communicate with her. that's what making up a relation, not abondaning her and marrying to a second wife. What if your second wife stop loving you too? Are you gonna marry to a third? Then fourth?.."

Allahul musta'an..

i respect the speaker, and i still do. Bi ithnillah.
But someone has to break this..
And i kinda regret that i didn't.

Lessons learnt: speak out your mind. Clarify. Be open to criticism.

This is just my 2 cents.

My opinions? You  may choose to disagree.

But if it's a commandment from Allah?
"sa mi'na wa ata'na", We hear and we obey..

The wisdoms of all these commandments?
It's up to you now to discover them.

Be proactive!

Allah please bless us in last night's gathering. Amin.

With so much love and peace,
Umm Teem.